Holy Cow.... I do believe I have been spoiled.... I thought I was busy and tied up before... how does 11 pounds disrupt an entire life...... lets see in 72 hours.. a perfectly grown up CLEAN house is now filthy, a perfectly grown woman is now filthy... toys everywhere..broken eyeglasses.. chewed up shoe.. isnt it funny how you forget when this happened to you before.. and you put yourself thru it again... its a nasty joke someone plays on us.

This Is Bella.. and she is our new Bernese Mountain Dog puppy.. she is 6 weeks old and we are Tired.. Very Tired.. like having a new baby in the house.. but she is funny and sweet and no matter what you cant help but love her... Welcome Bella.

This is the newest member of our family.. She wont be joining us for a couple more weeks.. Her name is Bella.. We have waited a long time to get a new dog.. I think a puppy is just what the doctor ordered for both of us.. Cant wait to get her.. Wish us luck !!!

Dont think I have been happier than I am right now .. I havent been here in a very long time.. just sayin.. Work has become a place that I enjoy going to again... Mike looks and feels great.. My parents are alive and well.. My son, My Sister and her family are all in my life. I have the BEST friends that anyone could have and I know the ones who love me.. really do love me.. Even though there is so much negativity I could think about.. Right now I am at peace where I am in my life.. I know for a fact I have been as honest, helpful , loving and kind as I possibly can and some days I realize how very blessed I am and have been..

January is in full swing.. Ive already had enough of it in more ways than one.. My diet is going.. not great.. but its still moving in the right direction.. Daddy is the same. Mom is good. Mike is doing well but again our life is day to day. Because we dont know when or how it will end.. but then does anyone ?? NO.. so even with our circumstance, we are in no worse shape than anyone else. He needs me as much as I need him. Work is going very well. Crafting will be coming up.. I have many gifts to make over the next few months.. Aprons will be a biggie.. found a very cute, girly one that will be fun to make. A few Valentine gifts and several other celebrations coming up.. Im hoping to go out west to visit a friend with a few other friends. I may be heading south for a wedding of a relative .. Mike maybe taking a cross country motorcycle trip with some good friends and we have a several other things planned this year. Busy and together time.. very important for 2012.. Im happy.. alot to be happy about even in all the sadness and again those missing in our lives. They will be so very very sorry for the times missed with Grandparents and Parents.. I hurt for them.. because they dont know how bad they will hurt later. This is time that will never ever come again. And a Dog is in our future.. we will start shopping for another Bernese very soon.. THAT is exciting !!!!!

2012 will be a Challenging Year.. A Year of struggle and A Year of Hope. Work is Changing so fast.. Its exciting, refreshing and frightening ...all at the same time.. Such is life. Mike is thru with all conventional medicine.. We are "on our own" basically for the remainder of his Cancer Journey. My Dad is deteriorating hour by hour, the hardening of his arteries make it very difficult for him to function daily. But, he still gets up , gets dressed and starts his day hopeful. Thats a blessing in itself. He makes it hard for me to lay down and give up. He cant hear, he cant speak most of the time, he has NO clue the conversations or the issues that swirl around him each day.. He prepares for his day dressed as handsome as a man can and then cruises thru the day oblivious to most of it. What makes him get up each morning and prepare himself for NOTHING. I am humbled every time I think of this... His will to live must out weigh the anguish he may or maybe doesnt feel.. I love him.

And so the New Year began this weekend... Nothing spectacular.. just a new beginning.. Im big on Ritual and Tradition so I still made all the Normal Resolutions.. This year my word is Focus..
Focus on Mikes Health
Focus on My Health
Focus on My Relationships
Focus on My Work

I also hope to be down 50 pounds this year. Its a big year as far as Milestones.. What percentage of the World still is married after 40 years. Its an Amazing feat and its been an Amazing Journey. We have changed and weathered the storm many times. At different times you make it work for different reasons. But always you love each other .
Also my High School 40th Reunion. How lucky I am to have many friends in my life that graduated with me ... We havent all been together thru the entire 40 years.. but in and out of each others lives in different ways.. thru even our own kids. You have to love a small town for that.. I live in a big city, but a nice suburb of it. 40 years ago we had a very strong sense of family, school and Tradition.. I came from a more than medium size graduating class.. over 350.. but we still knew everyone.
My blogging will get better this year .. another resolution. It will be a Monumental Year. Im sure of that. There will be many Events this year concerning different things going on in our life... Something Im not really looking forward to, but its inevitable. So, for all the turmoil and blessings in 2011.. 2012 is looming ..... but I know I will survive as long as I FOCUS.

This past weekend I had my Annual Christmas Party for the Girls I graduated with almost 40 years ago .. this year I invited some of the girls from my Sisters Class.. This is the picture with her friends and me... there were about 20 women all together and we had the best time..

WOW

Mike and 2 of his best Friends.. The 3 of them have been friends for over 50 years..

One of My Cousins sent me this Picture I had never seen before.. Its me holding my son.. the year is 1981.. Matt is almost 2.. I looked like a baby myself.. but I was 27..

Some of My Cousins.. Great Christmas Party we had.. our Annual Cousin Party.. On my Dads side.. we had 5 in our town not in the picture.. 2 in Indiana missing.. 1 in Florida and 2 in California.. but all alive and well.. We are blessed..

I work with some very special people.. Ive been with one of them for over 30 years.. 1 for over 25 years , 10 years and 5 years.. They are a great team... We win awards and have a really fun time working together.. Thank you Susan, Denise, Kim, Mandy and Felica !!!

Mike and I went to see Chicago tonight !!!! What a great Concert.. last time we saw them was in 1976... We had a great time

More wait..Future Chemo is not an option anymore...Meeting with a team that consists of our Thoracic Surgeon who took our last tumors out and a New type of Radiology called IMRT or something like that..These two zillion dollar docs are together only once a month for this type of consultation so our appt is in January....so no new news but at least they do want to talk to him in person

ITS Christmas time.. and I do not want to hear the words CANCER till after our appt .. it is scheduled now for January 5th.. .. by the way.. from all the scans the past 2 weeks.. the Liver, Abdomen, and Heart are all normal and clear. All other tissue and lymph nodes in the Lung area are clear.. Bladder, pelvic and bowel areas are clear and normal. Just 2...a 2.3 Centimeter Tumor located in the upper lobe of the right lung and a 2.0 Centimeter Tumor located in the center of the upper lobe of the left lung. If surgery is decided by the Specialists.. there will be 2 different Lung Surgeries.. since he prefers to not operate on both lungs at the same time for double risk of infection or pneumonia.. so 2 different lung surgeries.. in late January.. If IMRT I think thats it .. again. .thanks Jessica.. havent researched that yet.. is preferred by the 2 specialists after seeing him.. then we will have to be told how that will happen, how often, durations,,, etc... so .. thats ALL.. till after January 6th.. over a month.. no Cancer talk please.. Hugs will be accepted and appreciated.. but THATS it.. .

Corner in my Living Room.. My Nativity set is setting on a small table cloth that My Great Grandmother made me when I was born to later go on my little table and Chair set.. Its 57 years old this Christmas.. and still is beautiful.

The Living Room and the Mantle